


On the Windy Side

by Jelly



Series: The Primrose Path [4]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, F/M, Harry Potter Crossover - Freeform, Hogwarts AU, Uncle Levi, and this fandom just keep dragging me back, i am kicking and screaming but i can't leave, i love this au so much, snk but at hogwarts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-10-25 07:25:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10759539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jelly/pseuds/Jelly
Summary: Or: Levi's 18 step guide on how to get to know your estranged niece and her group of brats. Sorry.Friends.Hogwarts AU.





	On the Windy Side

**Author's Note:**

> This is Part 4 of [The Primrose Path series](http://archiveofourown.org/series/510929), which is basically just me having fun with the SNK kids at Hogwarts. I don't rely _too_ heavily on the previous installments, but if you're interested of have the time, please go and check out [The Marriage of True Minds](http://archiveofourown.org/works/6340567/chapters/14526490), [Asses are Made for Bearing](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7518223), and [Strange Bedfellows](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8140946).
> 
>  
> 
> _Enjoy!_

_On the Windy Side_

  


 

18.

Being a teenager isn’t hard.

 Not really. Not compared to being an actual adult human being with actual problems, and Levi is pretty convinced that teenagers are either idiots or incredibly self-centred (or both, in many cases) if they genuinely think that their problems matter _that_ much in the grand scheme of things. Spoiler alert: they don’t.

 “I don’t know that you’re really taking the time to appreciate the perils of being a teenager,” says Petra, looking rather entertained by all this.

 Levi groans and presses the glass of Firewhiskey to his forehead. “I don’t know how you do it,” he mutters. “Listening to drivel day in and day out about who’s in love with who and who’s set their homework on fire again. Honestly. I don’t care.”

 “Well, to be fair, most teenagers only come to me when they’re injured, and the stories behind those are usually pretty good.” Petra smirks. She tilts her head at him curiously. “I thought you rather enjoyed your afternoon teas with Mikasa.”  

 “I do,” admits Levi, but he sighs and takes a huge swig from the bottle in his hand. “I’d be lying if I said she hasn’t grown on me. She’s a sweet girl. Her friends, though…”

 “Are also very sweet,” says Petra. “I see them in here often enough - at least when they come to you, they haven’t done anything stupid enough to injure themselves.”

 Levi scowls at her. “Tch. They may not be injuring themselves, but the stupid isn’t in short supply. If I took a shot every time Jaeger did something less than clever, I’d be dead.”

 Petra just rolls her eyes at him and breaks a piece off the bar of chocolate on her desk. “I think you’re being a little harsh, Levi,” she says. “They’re _teenagers_. It’s better they make these mistakes now than have the same thing blow up in their faces when they’re much older.”

 “That’s _fine_ ,” mutters Levi. “It’s a pretty universally known fact that teenagers are idiots. I just wish I didn’t have to deal with it. Don’t you wonder how I’m always up to date with whatever the hell is going on in this school?”

 “Your niece, obviously.”

 Levi lets out a bark of a laugh because it’s hilarious that she thinks it’s that simple. “If only,” he snorts. “Mikasa, I can handle. She’s at least aware that these things aren’t the end of the world. Her friends, on the other hand… well. They’ve made themselves a little too comfortable in my office. I think they think I’m some sort of… counsellor.”

 Petra snorts loudly - so loudly, in fact, that she almost chokes on her chocolate. “ _You_?” she laughs. Levi’s honestly not sure if he should be insulted that she finds his being a counsellor hilarious. “Don’t get me wrong, Levi, you’re a fantastic teacher, but you’re hardly the type to give students advice. How on earth did you manage that?”

 Levi groans. “Well.”

  
  
  


1.

 It starts with a list.

 Levi glances over it while he’s having tea in his office. There’s nothing particularly striking about it – it’s only about twenty-ish names long, which is hardly out of the ordinary, but there’s a name on the top that he just sort of skims over and then does a double take on before he sprays it with his tea.

 He stares at it for a long time. It can’t be right, he thinks. He does the math in his head and decides it’s definitely _wrong_ , and this _must_ be some sick joke Hanji has convinced Erwin to play on him. He gets up.

 The walk to the Headmaster’s Office seems longer than usual. The statues in the Gargoyle Corridor leer at him, like they think this whole thing is hilarious, and he scowls. “ _Scouts_ ,” he spits at the statue at the end, and it springs to life and hops out of the way to let Levi up the hidden spiral staircase and into Erwin’s office.

 “What the hell is this?” he snaps, flinging the list at him.

 Erwin raises an eyebrow at him and lays today’s issue of the _Daily_ _Prophet_ on his desk, lips twitching upwards a little. Levi is almost personally insulted that he thinks this is funny. “I believe that’s the list of students who are supposed to be starting in the coming school year,” he says.

 Levi scowls. “Stop fucking around,” he snaps. “You couldn’t have warned me?”

 “About what?” says Erwin.

 Levi has never wanted to punch him in the nose so much. Headmaster or not, Erwin is being an ass. “You know what I’m talking about. How could you not warn me that Mikasa’s due to start here so soon?”

 “I thought you knew,” says Erwin mildly. “It _has_ been three years since the Jaegers took her in. It’s simple arithmetic, Levi.”

 “ _Simple arithmetic_.” Levi scoffs and throws his hands up in frustration. “She _can’t_ be eleven yet.”

 “She turned eleven in February. You sent her an owl to say happy birthday. I sent her acceptance letter with it.”

 “I knew it was her birthday, I didn’t know she was _eleven!_ ”

 Erwin smirks and crosses his arms across his chest. “What’s the matter, Levi? It was only a matter of time, you know – Mikasa has to take her place here at some point. Surely you’re not having trouble with the idea that she’s growing up so quickly?”

 “Fuck _off_.” Levi makes a face at him because no, it’s not that he’s having issues with that. He’s not exactly the paternal type – that was the whole point of having the Jaegers take her in in the first place. It’s just. Her parents’ deaths had been hard on them both, and he is not only a mostly stranger to her, but he has a hard enough time interacting with the kids here, let alone his own niece. It’s honestly a wonder he’s a teacher to begin with.

 “You’ll have to learn how to personally interact with her sometime,” says Erwin. “Grisha tells me she’s rather curious about you. You _will_ make an effort, won’t you?”

 The last sentence sounds oddly like a threat, and Levi scowls again. “Of course I’ll make an effort,” he grumbles – and he means it. He has always had every intention of getting to know his niece when the time came – it was a promise he’d made himself after his last argument with his brother was never resolved – he’d just had no idea that that time would come so soon. “I suppose that means I’ll have to make an effort with the Jaeger boy too?”

 Erwin smirks. “I’ve been told that they’re inseparable,” he says, picking up the _Prophet_ again. “I expect you’ll be seeing as much of him as Mikasa.”

 Levi sneers at him and snatches the list from his desk, muttering curses under his breath as he lets himself out.

  


 

2.

 The school year starts without a fuss. Mikasa’s in Gryffindor, which is hardly a surprise, and she and Jaeger kid spend most of their free time together with a couple of Ravenclaws – Arlert and the Leonhardt girl, he thinks (that _is_ a surprise, but he tries to not to comment on it for the sake of professionalism). He runs into them (outside of a classroom) for the first time while they’re having lunch during their first week.

 “Oh,” says Jaeger. “Hello Professor.”

 Mikasa regards him shyly from across the table.

 He coughs. “Would you care for some tea at the end of the week?” he asks stupidly.

 “Tea?” Jaeger cocks his head at him and glances at Mikasa. “Er. What for, exactly?”

 Levi breathes in patiently. “I was asking Mikasa,” he says, trying to be polite.

 “I _know_ that,” snaps Jaeger. “Still. What for?”

 “I will remind you, Jaeger, that I am a teacher and should be given a little more respect than that.”

 “If you’re asking her to tea, you’re not doing it as a teacher, you’re doing it as her uncle.”

 “ _Eren_.” Mikasa shoots him a disapproving frown and shakes her head. “Sorry, sir,” she says to Levi quietly. “He’s never really had a lot of tact. Um. Tea would be nice.”

 Levi nods. “You’re welcome too, I suppose,” he adds to Jaeger. “I’ll see you both on Friday then.” And he turns on his heel to head for the teacher’s table at the front of the hall, and tries to ignore the amused smirk on Erwin’s face as he goes.

  


 

 

3.

“So do I call you ‘Professor’ or ‘Uncle’?”

 It’s a pretty innocuous question but Levi almost spills his tea over the essays he’s supposed to be marking. Mikasa watches him curiously from across his desk, and he sets down his teacup and sits back to think about it. He supposes he shouldn’t be surprised – they’ve had tea together a few times now, and even outside of the classroom, he’s noticed the way she hesitates about what to call him.

 “Either, I suppose,” he says at last. “Professor in front of other students, probably.”

 “I’m an ‘other student’,” quips Jaeger unhelpfully, and Levi sighs and reminds himself that sass is not a reason to give someone detention. He really should be used to it by now. Mikasa’s only come to see him twice on her own - every other time, she has been accompanied by the Jaeger kid.

 “You don’t count, _obviously_ ,” he says, probably with a little more spite than he intends.

 Jaeger sniggers, and Mikasa rolls her eyes at him and shakes her head. “Uncle for now, then,” she says, like she’s testing the way it sounds. She nods like she approves. “Do you mind if we bring Armin and Annie and sometimes too?”

 Levi almost winces at the sound of the word ‘we’ because it means he’s probably _never_ going to be rid of Jaeger, and his office is crowded enough as it is because Jaeger’s got a voice loud enough for more than three students. He considers saying no for a moment, but Erwin’s voice rings in his head like some sick taunt specifically designed to remind him of that stupid promise he made to himself: “ _You_ will _make an effort, won’t you_?”

 “If they like,” he mutters with a sigh. “Try not to turn my office into another classroom though, hey?”

 “Just the four of us,” promises Mikasa. “I think you’d like Armin and Annie - they’re both pretty clever outside of transfiguration and they’ll probably a bit easier to get along with than… well.” She smirks and eyes Eren who’s tossing sugar cubes into the air and trying to catch them with his mouth.  

 Levi frowns at her because while it’s obvious that Eren is the butt of the joke, it sounds surprisingly like an accusation. “And what is that supposed to mean, exactly?” he asks.

 “ _Please_ ,” snorts Mikasa. “You don’t have to pretend you know what teenagers talk about for the sake of making a good impression.”

 Levi stares at her. “I know what teenagers talk about,” he says stupidly.

 Mikasa laughs.  “You’re not fooling anyone there, Uncle,” she giggles, knocking a sugar cube out of the air with another before Eren can catch it.

  
  
  


 4.

 Tea with Mikasa and her friends becomes a regular occurrence, and Levi finds that it’s actually not the worst experience. Arlert and Leonhardt are very easy to talk to – if only because Arlert has a lot of (actually very interesting) questions and all he has to do is answer, and Leonhardt doesn’t talk very much at all. They’re an odd group, but in the end, Levi supposes that his opinion doesn’t matter a lot anyway.

 They talk a lot when all four of them come to visit.

 Levi wonders how they still have things to talk about despite the fact that they spend most of their day together. Usually, he’s just content to listen (or pretend to listen) while he does his marking. He can’t say the goings-on in his students’ lives are particularly interesting, but occasionally he’ll pick up their latest mishaps, which would be funny, normally, except that the ‘what-the-hell?’ factor is so _real_ that it puts his own shenanigans when he was here as a student to shame.

 (Not that he had many. Well. He did. But that’s not the point).

 “You know that Dok threatened me with a detention the other day?” says Eren mildly.

 Mikasa snorts. “What’d you do that time?”

 “He saw me on my way out of Ravenclaw Tower.”

 Levi pauses and raises an eyebrow. “What were you doing in Ravenclaw Tower?”

 “I was giving Armin his textbook back,” says Eren, like there’s absolutely nothing wrong with the fact that he was in a common room that wasn’t his own. “Apparently I’m not allowed in there.”

 “You’re _not_. Surely you knew that.” Levi eyes the Ravenclaws sternly. “Did you two let him in?”

 “I had nothing to do with it,” says Leonhardt, and Levi believes her because she seems to enjoy Jaeger’s misery as much as he does.

 Arlert blinks, though. “Why would he not be allowed in our common room?”

 “He’s a _Gryffindor_ ,” says Levi. “The only common room he should be in is his _own_.”

 Arlert blinks again, and he opens his mouth to say something else, but Leonhardt elbows him and he snaps his mouth closed. He takes a breath. “Don’t you think it’s silly that you’re not allowed to let students from other houses into your common room?”

 “ _No_ ,” snaps Levi. “Theft has happened in this school before, and your common room is supposed to be _secure_. At least if it did happen, we could narrow it down to who’s in your house.”

 Arlert tilts his head curiously at him. “Don’t you think it encourages – well – people like the Slytherins? I mean Braun and Hoover enjoy literally every excuse to make fun of muggle born kids, and even logistically it causes problems. I mean, this castle is _huge_ , and Ravenclaw Tower is so much closer to the library than, say, the Hufflepuff common room – what happens if a couple of Hufflepuffs get caught out after curfew because they were studying with some Ravenclaws when it would have been faster for them to just bunk with the Ravenclaws?”

 “Those are the _rules_ , Arlert,” says Levi sternly. “If you have problems with them, take it up with the Headmaster but until then, you are _not_ to let Jaeger into Ravenclaw Tower, is that understood?”

 Arlert flushes like he’s just been told off. “Yes, sir, sorry sir,” he mumbles, swinging his legs guiltily, but he shoots a sidelong glance at Jaeger and Levi groans because he has a feeling that no one in the room took his warning to heart.

  


 

5\. 

Levi’s not about to admit it to anyone, but he grows kind of fond of Friday afternoons. Maybe it’s some kind of weird Stockholm Syndrome, and he just gets so used to Mikasa and her group of brats – sorry – _friends_ – barging into his office that it when only some of them turn up, he asks why almost automatically.

 “Where are Arlert and Leonhardt today?”

 Mikasa lets out an undignified snort. “Being stupid kids,” she says, helping herself to some tea.

 Levi raises an eyebrow at her and she shrugs.

 “You wouldn’t care,” she says.

 She’s probably right but curiosity gets the better of him. “Tell me anyway.”

 Mikasa sets down her tea and sighs dramatically, slumping over in her seat and onto Jaeger.

 He just rolls his eyes at her and prods her forehead. “I don’t see what _you’re_ complaining about,” he says, hiding an amused grin behind a biscuit. “At least Annie doesn’t pine. Armin’s like a lovesick puppy.”

 “Ah,” says Levi. He knows the feeling. It’s hard to avoid watching young love blossom between awkward teenagers in a school full of them. Other staff members ( _Petra_ ) think it’s cute, but Levi’s either been here far too long, or he’s just always been incredibly jaded, because to him, it’s just frustrating. “They’re handling it better than Kefka and Diamant, at least,” he says. (They are. Kefka and Diamant have the entire back row of his classroom to themselves because no one else wants to deal with them).

“We don’t have to be around Franz and Hannah every moment of every day,” mutters Mikasa. “We could probably argue that Annie and Armin are worse. I mean. It’s kind of terrible to hold it against them – they don’t _mean_ to be annoying about it. It’s just…” She groans and tips her head back, and Jaeger makes a face and eases her off him.

 Levi snorts and turns back to his marking, pretending he’s not at all impressed with how well adjusted his niece is. “Guess all you can really do is wait,” he says absently. “I’m sure Arlert’ll get sick of their dumb game eventually.”

 Mikasa sits up and frowns at him. “Have you _met_ Annie? She’ll get sick of this first, just you watch.”

 Levi smirks at her. “I wouldn’t put money on it.”

 “I _would_ put money on it,” says Mikasa. There’s a spark in her eye that is all too familiar, and Levi honestly doesn’t know why he’s so surprised that she’s as competitive as he was in his youth. “I know them a lot better than you do, Uncle.”

 “ _Wow_ ,” says Jaeger, smirking. “I can’t believe _I’m_ the one saying this, but don’t you think it’s a little… well… wrong that you’re betting on our friends’ love lives?”

 There’s a pause. Then Mikasa shrugs. “Five galleons,” she says. “Five galleons says Annie makes the first move.”

 Levi barks out a laugh. “You’re on, Ackerman.”

 

 

 

6\. 

At some point, Jaeger and Arlert must decide that he’s not nearly as strict or as scary as he pretends to be, and that his office is as good a spot to hang out as any, because part-way through their second year, they start visiting without Mikasa. He’s not about to flatter himself by thinking they’ve taken a liking to him - it’s probably more accurate to assume that he’s the only teacher they feel comfortable admitting their screw-ups to. It’s an odd thing, for teenagers to confide in him about their poor decision-making, and he reasons that they do because he gives Jaeger so many detentions that one) anything Arlert does that counts as a ‘screw up’ pales in comparison to all the shit Jaeger manages to get up to, and two) Jaeger just _doesn’t_ _care_ anymore.

 Levi is reminded of this every time he thinks he’s having a pretty good afternoon and his office door slams open.

 He groans. “What is it, _now_?”

 Jaeger laughs nervously as he paces up and down Levi’s office. “The-the thing is,” he begins. “Well. It’s complicated. And uh - long story short - do you - uh - happen to know any spells that might reverse - ahem - burn damage?”

 Levi pauses. “What have you done?” he asks.

 Jaeger flushes and stares at his shoes. “I set Annie’s homework on fire.”

 Levi stares at him, and his lips twitch slightly because in his mind, this is _fucking hilarious_. The Leonhardt girl is pretty terrifying to other students on her own, but he imagines that having her homework reduced to ashes is one of the things that would set her on a warpath. Once - about a month ago, actually - Jaeger had accidentally lost the bludgers and had badgered her endlessly until she agreed to help him find them. Pixis had given them both detention for it, and she had reacted by hitting Jaeger square in the head with a bludger during their next Quidditch match.

 (It was an accident, he’s sure of it, but Jaeger had barged into his office after he’d recovered swearing on his life that ‘she wanted to murder him, could he please recommend some good defensive charms’).

 “How did you manage that, exactly?” Levi asks him at last, trying not to laugh.

 “I - uh - she left her bag in Gryffindor Tower and -”

 Levi groans. “They were in your common room _again_? For God’s sake, Jaeger, _how many times_ -”

 “That’s _so_ not the point right now!” Jaeger’s voice cracks under the pressure, and he wrings his hands and glances at the door like Leonhardt could burst in at any second demanding blood. “Look, okay, it was an accident - I hadn’t finished my Potions essay and she and Armin finished theirs forever ago and - it was a good idea at the time, but I _swear -_ ”

 “Stop talking.” Levi groans and massages his forehead. “Also, _detention_ because you went through another student’s personal belongings without their permission _and_ you destroyed their property.”

 Eren groans and folds into the seat in front of Levi’s desk. “I am honestly more afraid of Annie right now,” he mutters. For a moment, Levi thinks the sass is uncalled for - but then he remembers that he is restricted to certain forms of punishment and Leonhardt is a beater of the Ravenclaw Quidditch Team and could probably get away with aiming a bludger at him again.

 “Okay, but, look,” says Jaeger. “It’s my fault, I get that, but do you think you could talk to Professor Bossard? I mean, Annie’s gonna kill me already and I one hundred percent deserve it - but don’t make her write out that essay again. You know as well as I do that she could probably brew it her sleep if she wanted to anyway.”

 Levi studies him carefully and, irritation aside, he supposes he can’t deny that Jaeger’s a good kid. He rolls his eyes. “Whatever,” he grumbles. “I’ll talk to Bossard. But you _will_ admit what you did, and you _will_ apologise for it.”

 “I know,” mumbles Jaeger.

 “And God help you if she decides she doesn’t want to be forgiving.

Jaeger winces.

 

  


 

7.

 “Boys are stupid.”

 It’s a Tuesday afternoon, and Mikasa is here on her own, so Levi can only assume that ‘boys are stupid’ is her way of saying she is _really_ pissed off at Jaeger.

 “What’s he done?” asks Levi absently.

 “You wouldn’t care,” mutters Mikasa, and she huffs and pops a sugar cube into her mouth.

 He pauses and studies her because she has never ostensibly had a sweet tooth and the fact that she’s eating _whole sugar cubes_ is kind of alarming. He’s also a little insulted that she thinks he wouldn’t care. Admittedly, he might not - but he would have thought after two years of Friday Afternoon Teas, she would feel comfortable enough with him to at least consider that he _might_ care.

 He purses his lips. “Should I… threaten to fail him… or something...?” he asks stupidly.

 Despite herself, Mikasa giggles, and he high-fives himself in his mind for at least getting that.

 “You shouldn’t use your position as a teacher to get revenge on someone on my behalf,” says Mikasa sagely.

 “I shouldn’t,” says Levi, “but if Jaeger’s pissed you off _that_ much, I feel like it’s an option I should seriously consider.”

 She snorts. “I don’t know that he’s worried enough about failing for something like that to matter.”

 “Maybe I should tell Leonhardt he borrowed her broom instead.”

 Mikasa lets out a laugh at that, and Levi’s lips twitch upward into an oddly satisfied grin. She shifts in her seat and helps herself to another sugar cube. “He hasn’t done anything in particular,” she mumbles at last. “He’s just dumb. He spends so much more time with Armin and Annie nowadays that I barely see him outside of classes.”

 “Don’t you have all your classes _together_ though?”

 “Not the point.” Mikasa scowls to herself and crosses her arms in front of her chest. “I’m just… starting to feel a little left out, I guess. But I mean, come on. This isn’t exactly a crisis. I’m sure you have other things to worry about. This is just dumb.”

 It _is_ dumb because the solution is pretty simple, in Levi’s eyes, but he’s not about to say that out loud. He hums thoughtfully instead and sets down his quill. “You do mother him a little bit,” he says carefully. “And he _needs_ it - he is - probably - among the dumbest students I have ever met. Well. All right, he’s not _that_ dumb, but socially speaking…” Levi makes a sort of wavy gesture with his hand. “My point is let him be for a bit. Let him be stupid, that’s the whole point of being young. He’s got his mother to worry about it for him, he doesn’t need you to do it too. Besides, there are other, _better_ things to worry about like… what would happen if I actually _did_ tell Leonhardt that he borrowed her broom.”

 Mikasa snorts loudly. “Annie would _literally_ murder him and that is the _opposite_ of what should happen if you want me to stop worrying.” She considers the sugar bowl for a moment, but she shakes her head and pours herself a cup of tea.

 Levi shrugs, secretly very pleased that she’s feeling better enough to refuse the sugar cubes. “It _would_ be funny, though.”

 “It’d be hilarious,” says Mikasa. She pauses. “You’re not so bad at this uncle thing.”

 “Don’t tell anyone else that,” quips Levi, turning back to his lesson plans. “I’d hate for anyone to think I’m going soft.”

 Mikasa chuckles into her tea. “It’s a bit late for that, Uncle.”

 

 

   

 8.

“Rook to H6.”

 Arlert hums thoughtfully to himself and frowns at the board. He’s always been a smart kid – Levi’s pretty aware of how quickly he grasps concepts and how easily he can alter his mode of thought. At times, it had seemed like the course work was too easy for him, so he assumes this is why Mikasa, Jaeger, and Leonhardt had pooled their funds together last year to get him a mahogany chess set for his birthday.

 He’s sure it was probably a good idea at the time, but it wasn’t until Arlert had turned up at his office one afternoon that the problem had become apparent.

 “No one else can play me,” he’d said. “Well. I mean. They _can_ , but it’s too easy – no offense to them. Would you be interested at all?”

 Levi had snorted because yeah, _right_ , Arlert might be smart, but there’s no way he would come even a little close to winning against someone as practised as Levi – but okay, whatever, challenge accepted and – well –

 Arlert had won their first match, and, legitimately furious that he’d let himself lose so miserably, Levi had invited him back the following fortnight for a rematch.

 That was months ago. Arlert comes by every second Thursday now. Levi’s not sure that he enjoys it anymore – the kid wins far too often for his liking.

 “Knight to C6.”

 Arlert’s mahogany knight pulls his visor over his face and trots over to square. It nods apologetically at Levi’s bishop before it thumps it over the head with the butt of its sword and drags it off the board.

 Levi scowls.

 “Doesn’t this seem like a waste of magical energy to you?” Arlert asks absently.

 Levi raises an eyebrow at him. “How do you mean?”

 “Well,” says Arlert thoughtfully. “Energy is pretty expensive in the muggle world, and you know, they automate a lot of things to cut down on costs but all that power has to come from somewhere. Where does the power come from for the pieces? And why bother? Uh – no offense, guys,” he adds to his chess pieces. “I just mean like… it takes minimal energy to just move the pieces yourself.”

 Levi shrugs. “The power comes from the wizard that enchanted them, I guess. Pawn to A3.”

 “But surely he doesn’t supply that power himself,” says Arlert. “I mean. The guy who made my set must have made thousands of sets over his lifetime. He can’t be using his own magical energy to power all of them at once. Is there like – a reservoir or something? Rook to H8.”

 Levi shakes his head at him. “It’s less complicated than that. When experienced wizards enchant something, that thing stays enchanted forever or until someone breaks the enchantment. But it’s not the same as, say, muggle batteries. They don’t run out of power.”

 “But then _where_ does the energy come from?” Arlert’s frown deepens as he leans back in his chair. “I mean – if that’s really what’s going on, then every wizard who enchants anything basically breaks _every_ law of physics.”

 “They’re wizards, Arlert, not scientists. Rook to H8. Nice try.”

 “It just – it doesn’t make sense.”

 “It’s not _supposed_ to, it’s _magic._ ”

 Arlert huffs. “Bishop to G5. Energy doesn’t work like that, though – the pieces _have_ to use up that energy every time they move – they physically _can’t_ be enchanted forever. Checkmate, by the way.”

 Levi stares at the board and finds that he is, indeed, in checkmate. Arlert had used his rooks as bait while he moved his knight and bishop into position and he’d fallen for it like a chump. “I’m starting to think you’re using these discussions as a way to keep me distracted,” he grumbles, as his king tosses its crown at Arlert’s bishop in frustration. “Talk to Headmaster Smith,” he says, ushering his pieces off the board. “I think you’ll find he might have some more conclusive answers for you.”

 Arlert shrugs and nods. “Maybe I will, then,” he says thoughtfully. “That’s, what, eighteen wins to me, and fourteen for you?”

 Levi makes a face. “Don’t tell your other friends.”

 He laughs. “I’m insulted you think I’m such a sore winner.”

 

 

 

9.

 Despite how often she comes to visit with Mikasa, Leonhardt has never visited him on her own. He supposes that makes sense - they are a bit alike, in some ways. She’s probably the most well-adjusted, and is generally sort of… _above_ the usual shenanigans, except for when Arlert drags her into them. She’s spent most of her time here so far building a no-bullshit reputation and he’s heard of what she’s had to deal with from her father, and from the Slytherins and she’s never once risen to the taunts. Levi respects her for that.

 Which is why he nearly falls out of his chair the day she hurries into his office and slams the door behind her in her fourth year.

 “Leonhardt?” He sputters for a moment, because while he does respect her for the amount of effort she puts into _not_ being involved with bullshit, he also has dealt with her so little that he kind of doesn’t even know how to. “What the hell are you doing here on your own?”

 She jumps like she hadn’t realized he was there at all. “ _Fuck_ ,” she mutters. “This is _your_ office.”

 Levi nods slowly and sets down today’s newspaper. “So it would seem.”

 “Uh -” She falters and glances at him, and then at the door, and then at him again, before she shifts uncomfortably and turns her eyes to her shoes. “Sorry, sir. I’m – uh – I’m hiding.”

 He blinks at her. He doesn’t ask her from who because he already knows. “Doesn’t seem like your style,” he says mildly.

 “It’s not,” she says shortly. “Just. I don’t want to deal with this again. Not today.”

 “Ah.” Levi pauses. “Where’s Arlert?”

 She snorts. “In Divination with the others.”

 “Oh,” he says. He coughs and taps the teapot on his desk with his wand. “Tea?” he asks.

 Leonhardt stares at him. For a moment he thinks that she might suddenly realize what she’s doing and why she’s in _his_ office, of all places; like she might storm back out and curse the poor idiots who’ve decided to screw with her today in order to preserve the walls and the reputation she’d spent so long putting up. But then she blinks and says, “Uh. Sure.”

 Levi blinks too, a little taken aback, before he decides that the Braun and Hoover boys must be giving her _hell_ if she’s choosing to have tea with him instead. “You shouldn’t let them get to you,” he says, summoning a couple of mugs from the shelf. “You never have before. What’s different today?”

 She shrugs. “I’m tired,” she grumbles.

 She probably is. She’s probably exhausted from having to deal with it every damn day she’s here.

 “If you hex them now, I can pretend I didn’t see it.”

 “Don’t tempt me,” she mutters darkly.

 Levi pauses and reconsiders his tactics. The humour would have worked on Mikasa, he thinks, but – similar in personality though they are – Leonhardt has dealt with this for far longer. He purses his lips. “You’re welcome to stay here if you like,” he says. He picks up the newspaper again.

 She stares some more. “Why aren’t you telling me to go back out there and stop hiding from them and all that other bullshit you’re supposed to say?”

 “Language,” he says mildly. “And you already know your options, why should I tell you more about them?”

 “Aren’t you supposed to offer advice or something?”

 “You don’t want my advice. I’m pretty sure if I gave it, you’d be gone in a second, and it would be a little unfair to do that when you so obviously don’t want to be out there.” He peers at her over the top of the paper.

 “I don’t particularly want to be stuck in here, either.”

 Levi shrugs. “My offers still stand. You can stay for as long as you like or you can hex them. I’ll pretend I wasn’t looking.”

 There’s a pause. It’s less awkward than Levi expects it to be, and Leonhardt drums her fingers against her mug and stares into its depths like she’s thinking _really_ hard about it. Then she slams the mug back down on his desk and pulls her wand out of her bag.

 “I recommend a sardine hex,” he says, turning back to the paper. “Harmless, but it’ll have the school talking for weeks.”

 He thinks he hears Leonhardt snort on her way out. The door shuts behind her, but he can’t help but snigger to himself when the Braun and Hoover boys start shrieking in the hall.

 

 

 

10.

“Why is the incantation for the Patronus Charm the Latin for ‘I wait for my father’?”

“I honestly don’t know.”

 

 

 

11.

“Weird question: is it against school rules to sneak a bunch of Doxies into the Slytherin Common Room?”

“… _Yes._ ”

 

 

 

12.

“Do you think Professor Dok would mind if I set up a Wifi connection in Ravenclaw Tower?”

“I don’t think Dok even knows what that is.”

 

 

 

13.

“How many of these sugar cubes do you reckon I could keep in my mouth at once?”

“Please don’t.”

 

 

 

14.

“Are you ever gonna tell me about what happened between you and my dad?”

Levi pauses. Well. The question was going to come some time – he’s not so much surprised that Mikasa’s asking so much as he is surprised that she actually waited five years before she did. He sighs. “I don’t suppose you want to talk about this some time else?”

Mikasa gives him a look. “I think I’ve waited long enough, Uncle.”

He grimaces. “We didn’t get along over a lot of things,” he mutters.

“Is that all?”

“A _lot_ of things.” Levi shifts uncomfortably. “Our dad died just after we both graduated from here. He – your dad, I mean – sort of expected that we’d both take over the family business. I don’t think he ever approved of me wanting more than that.”

“What do you mean?”

He shrugs. “I just didn’t want to be confined to the business, I guess. I think it would have been better if I’d just told him so, but I don’t think I could deal with it at the time. Smith offered me a job – meant I had to move all the way up here, and one of the first things he had me do was visit Ilvermorny to compare curriculums. I used it as an excuse.”

“You left?”

Levi nods. “I left. I didn’t tell him when I got back. The next thing I knew, he and your mother had died.”

“Oh.”

There’s a pause. Mikasa stares thoughtfully into her tea. For a moment, Levi thinks he might have said something wrong.

“Do you regret asking?”

She shakes her head. “No,” she says. “Thank you for telling me. But no offense, Uncle, all of that just seems really stupid.”

Levi snorts, and he leans back in his chair and stares up at the ceiling. “Believe me,” he mutters. “If there’s one thing I regret, it’s the amount of stupid I was back in the day. You’re not mad?”

“Why would I be mad?” Mikasa asks, cocking her head at him curiously. “I hang out with Eren all the time – I’m pretty well acquainted with stupid. I guess… I think it’s a shame that you and my dad couldn’t have gotten along better. I think I might have enjoyed your company earlier.”

Levi lets out a laugh. He wants to say something sarcastic, or funny, he thinks, but the sentiment is so nice that he pats her head awkwardly and says, “Yeah. I think I might have enjoyed your company earlier too.”

 

 

 

 15

 “ _Jaeger!_ ”

 They’re not in his office today. It’s a little bit impossible to keep students from exploring their – er – _needs_ , and Levi has walked in on so many students making out in the halls that it doesn’t really phase him anymore – until yesterday afternoon when he’d caught Jaeger sucking face with his niece. He’d spotted him and Arlert leaving the Great Hall together and had cornered them before they could get any further.

 Jaeger stares at him. “Come _on._ You gave me a detention for it already. What, am I supposed to ask _you_ for permission to hang out with her now?”

 Levi bristles. “Mikasa doesn’t need my permission for anything,” he snaps. “But I’m warning you, Jaeger, if anything… _happens_ …”

 “Oh, _God_.” Jaeger gags and hides his face behind his hand. “I am _so_ not having this talk from _you_.”

 “You’re getting it anyway,” snarls Levi. “Don’t look so smug, Arlert, I may not care _as much_ but don’t think I don’t know about you and Leonhardt.”

 Arlert flushes. “N-nothing’s happening with me and Annie, whatareyoutalkingabout?”

 “Why are you threatening _us_ about it – the girls are tons more dangerous than we are –”

 “Where – where would you even get the – the idea that me and Annie are a thing, I mean –”

 “ _Christ._ ” Levi groans and rubs a palm across his face. “Stop stammering, Arlert, it’s not that big a deal. Any person with eyes can see you’ve both finally pulled your heads out of your asses.” He rounds on Jaeger. “Listen up, brat. Do _not_ fuck this up. Mikasa might be terrifying on her own, but if you screw this up, and if you – _hurt_ her in anyway, she will be the least of your worries, have I made myself clear?”

 Jaeger stares at him. “When did you get so attached?”

 “I’m not _attached_ ,” he snaps (although, yeah, yeah he is). “ _Have I made myself clear?_ ”

 Jaeger scowls at him. “ _Crystal._ ”

 

 

 

16

 Mikasa practically skips into his office one morning looking very pleased about something, and it takes Levi longer than he wants to admit to figure it out.

 She holds out her palm. “You owe me five galleons.”

 Levi raises an eyebrow at her.

 “Don’t pretend you don’t know,” she laughs. “Annie made the first move. Pay up.”

 Levi frowns at her, but the memory of their wager comes flooding back, along with image of Leonhardt planting one hell of a kiss on Arlert in the Great Hall during breakfast this morning. He snorts into his tea. “We made that bet _years_ ago.”

 “Doesn’t change the fact that I was _riiight_.” She grins, flexing her fingers. “Pay up.”

 He rolls his eyes and opens his desk drawer, pausing over the satchel of galleons in the corner. He stares at it for a moment because the timeline doesn’t seem quite right, and he distinctly remembers Professor Zacharius complaining loudly about ‘those two Ravenclaw brats’ thinking it was okay to use the section in the Library on Goblin Law as a romantic hideout as early as last June. Come to think about it, he thought they’d been dating for far longer than just this morning, and suddenly he’s really confused about why Mikasa only thinks they’d just started today.

 He picks at the satchel. “Are you sure it was Leonhardt who made the first move?”

 Mikasa snorts like it’s obvious. “You saw them this morning – hell, the whole school probably did –”

 “No, I mean –” He tosses the satchel in the air and catches it again with a flourish. “Are you _sure_ they only decided to get together this morning?”

 Mikasa snorts again. “I think I would know if they had, Uncle.”

 This still doesn’t seem right because he’d been one of the unfortunate fools who thought it might be a good idea to talk Zacharius down, and the words ‘didn’t even know Arlert had the guts’ ring clear in his mind. The more he thinks about it, the more he’s certain that Arlert and Leonhardt are sneakier than he gave them credit for, and the more he’s certain that it wasn’t Leonhardt who made the first move – not with the way her father had been acting, anyway, and certainly not with the way the Braun and Hoover boys had been reminding her of it.

 For a moment, he considers telling Mikasa this. There are a lot more things he’s noticed as a teacher that she wouldn’t have, but he glances at the eager smile on her face, and he sighs.

 He tosses the satchel at her. “A wager’s a wager, I suppose,” he says at last.

 Her grin widens, and, in probably the most childish display he’s seen of her, she sticks her tongue out at him and skips out of his office.

 

 

 

 17

 Before Christmas break of their final year, Mikasa and her friends actually knock, for once, and Levi opens his office door to find the four of them with a bottle of Firewhiskey and a gigantic bar of (his favourite) chocolate from Honeydukes.

 “We got you a Christmas present,” says Jaeger. “Or birthday present. Both. Just take them.”

 Levi does, trying not to look too flattered by the gesture. “Uh. Thank you, I suppose,” he says stupidly. “You – uh – you shouldn’t have.”

 Arlert grins. “Consider it a thank you from us,” he says. “I mean. We’ve bothered you lot over the last few years. We thought it would be nice.”

 “It _is_ nice,” Levi admits, and he allows the corners of his lips to tilt upwards and into a grateful smile. “Thank you. Really. Although, I don’t know what exactly I’m supposed to do with all this chocolate on my own.”

 “You could share it with Madame Ral?” suggests Leonhardt with an impish smirk.

 Levi almost drops the bottle, and he frowns at her, considering telling her off for her gall – accusing a teacher of being interested in another staff member – it’s true, but _how dare she_ – and wondering how she would know to begin with, but he glances at Mikasa and suddenly it all makes sense. He gives his niece a _look._

 “What?” she says. “You’ve given all of us crap about our relationships before. Fair’s fair, Uncle.” She grins. “If you’re free at all on Christmas Day, you should come by ours for Christmas Dinner. Mr. Jaeger says it’s been a while since he’s seen you.”

 Levi can’t help the chuckle that escapes from his lips. “I’ll think about it,” he says. “I imagine you lot are about to head off for your holidays?”

 They nod.

 “The train leaves in half an hour,” Arlert tells him. “We thought we’d drop off your presents before we left.”

 “Well, thank you,” Levi says again. “I’ll see you all next year, I suppose.”

 “Count on it,” says Jaeger. “Bye!”

 “Have a good holiday, won’t you, Uncle?” adds Mikasa. “And if you do have time, please do come by ours. It’d be nice to see you over the break.”

 Levi chuckles. “Sure thing, kid,” he says, ruffling her hair briefly.

 She grins at him and waves as her friends tug her down the hall.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 18 again.

Petra laughs. The sound is high and bell like, and it makes Levi’s ears feel warm. He ignores it by draining his glass of Firewhiskey.

 “What are you laughing at?” he grumbles.

 She breaks off another piece of chocolate and forces herself to breathe. “Sorry,” she giggles. “But they got you a bottle of _very_ good Firewhiskey and found out what type of chocolate you enjoy most. If you ask me, you’re not _that_ annoyed or you would have started complaining about it long before now.”

 “What are you implying, exactly?”

 “Oh, Levi,” she chuckles. “Just admit that you’re going to miss them after they graduate!”

 Levi snorts and pours himself another glass. “I’m not going to _miss them_ ,” he snaps, probably a little harsher than he means.

 Petra ignores him. “You’re going to miss having tea with Mikasa, and playing chess with Armin, and giving Eren detentions for stupid things – and even Annie, and all the sass she gives you.”

 Levi shifts uncomfortably because Petra is all sorts of right. He’s grown pretty fond of the, to be totally honest – he just doesn’t know how to admit it. “I’m _not_ going to miss them,” he grumbles again.

 Petra laughs. “Of course you’re not,” she says briskly. “I’m sure Mikasa will keep in touch and will drop in every now and then, and now that Annie’s sorted things out with her dad, I imagine you’ll see plenty of her at the meetings with the school governors. You’ll see the boys regularly through them, I’m sure, so it’s not the end of the world.”

 Levi sighs and breaks off a piece of chocolate. “No,” he mumbles at last. “I suppose its not.”

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> 1) I thought I'd escaped this fandom but literally no matter what I do, I keep getting dragged back into it.
> 
> 2) Originally this was supposed to be a lot angstier, but one, I am pathetic and weak, and two, it would have been a lot longer. I physically can't commit to anything more than a chapter long, and I am busy enough without that kind of added stress in my life.
> 
> 3) Armin is basically a mouthpiece for me in this fic, and it gave me the rare opportunity to ask about stuff in-universe that doesn't make sense. Like, I have always loved Harry Potter, and I will probably love it for the rest of my life, but there are some things in-universe that make zero sense - the incantation 'Expecto Patronum', for example, literally means 'I wait for my father' (Expecto = I wait, or I await, and Patronum = derived from pater = father). This is pretty cool trivia from a Doylist (or out of universe) perspective, considering Harry used this spell while he was waiting for his dad to come and save them from the dementors in POA, but from a Watsonian (or in-universe) perspective, this makes no sense AT ALL. Surely there are kids at Hogwarts who have a vague understanding of Latin who would ask about this??? And what about enchantments on inanimate objects??? Where does the power come from?????? If the wizard who enchants them uses his own magic to breathe life into them, does that mean they stop being enchanted when he dies????? This is a p poor business strategy AND we've seen in the case of things like the Sorting Hat that this isn't the case. I wrote in 'The Marriage of True Minds' that Annie bewitched Armin's grandad's tea to always stay warm, and I wrote it bc it was a neat trick, but I knew in my mind that, by doing that, Annie pretty much just broke the laws of thermodynamics, and that shits me to this day. TLDR; I am a nerd, and I have many questions.
> 
> 4) Doxies are little fairies with shiny black wings and venemous teeth, generally considered pests. They are sometimes known as biting fairies, and bites require antidote immediately.


End file.
